Thursday, January 8, 2009

Time Flies.

Listening to :
You're Gonna Miss This- Trace Adkins
Letter to Me- Brad Paisley
Don't Blink- Kenny Chesney
All 3 of these songs/videos made me tear up :)

Lately, I've been looking at life very differently than I expected I would be at 17. As a kid you think everything passes so slowly. School, classes, the weeks, the years, everything. As you get older you start to realize that it doesn't pass slowly at all. I cannot count over the years of my life how many times I've heard adults say "time passes more quickly than you know it. You'll see it one day." Well, just like they said, that day has come, and I understand what they were talking about all those years. I got a sense of just how quickly life passes and how incredibly important it is to cherish each moment of it.

Today I did the usual. Got up, went to school, went to community service, came home, and went to pick up my sister (who's in 8th grade) from basketball practice. Something was different about today though. I drove in a blur all the way to the school and thought about how young I was, and how old I was, at the same time. I pulled into the parking lot and parked and just stared at the front of the school. I thought about that morning. I had looked at all the kids standing on the corner waiting for the bus to pick them up to take them to Jr. High, like it does every morning. Now all the kids get bussed to Big Rock, due to the combined Jr. High they have. (When I was in 8th grade I went to Jr. High and Elementary School all at Hinckley Elementary School and it was within walking distance from my house). It brought me right back to 8th grade. I remember rushing to get ready every morning so that I could get to school that much earlier to be standing in front of the school for 30 minutes before school started. Of course, I was there! I needed that 30 minutes to talk to my friends about anything and everything. I also recalled that I would walk with my four best guy friends to get to school. I thought about how much I loved that time and cherished the talks and laughs I had with them every morning. It was the absolute best way to start the day. If I had known what a short occurrence in my life this was going to be, I would've cherished it a lot more. Also, if I had known that very next year, one of the boys I walked to school with everyday, Stan Janik, would be suddenly taken from all our lives... I would've hugged him more, joked with him more...known him more. But I didn't know those things then, not like I know them now.

I sat in my car, thinking of all these things, and still more memories came flooding back. My 8th grade year, all our field trips, all our friends, our memories. That year I had the best memories, the best times, and the best friends that I've ever had. As I sat and pondered all of this I started thinking of high school. Freshman and Sophomore year were there in my mind and gone in a flash. Junior year seems longer and more vivid since it was only last year but still that was over in such a "short time" as well. And now I've arrived, senior year, the awaited year by all kids, and I find myself envious of these young kids that are just half way through 8th grade. 8th grade, which still to this day, almost 4 years later, was the best year of my life. I was a free and wonderfully happy kid then. I am still free, and still wonderfully happy, but I often miss that time.

Now I get so busy thinking about my future. College, my future job, house, kids, husband...life. I get so busy thinking about what's to come that I forget to think about what's here and now. My family, my friends, and my dear old school that I still attend, and do truly love. I forget how much I love staying up laughing until I cry with my friends that have always been there, and how much I live for cheering my school on in their games. I lose sight of these things, and miss them because I get so focused on what's to come. Lately though, it's been different. I'm not in 8th grade anymore. Now I know how precious each day.. actually, each and every minute is! It all passes in a flash. This time I know that... I know that each day that passes leads onto another, but you can't forget the day you've just had. You'll miss it. When I'm 25 I guarantee I'll be thinking about how I'm "envious" of those young seniors and how much they have to experience still. I'll be doing that all through life and that's totally fine! I will not only be thinking of that, but I'll be fortunate enough to know how blessed I am to be living in the here and now. I'll know that the life I have and the moments I've been given are ridiculously beautiful and huge blessings. Also, I'll be able to cherish and love all the things those experiences have taught me so that I can continue to pass on that knowledge.